5:00 PM

not all te way through..

Remember, Prophet Muhammad once said,
"Allah loves the servant, in which, when he does something, he does it with excellence." (or as how the prophet quoted it)

asslamualikaum brothers and sisters.

yesterday was really something. i was shocked, perplexed, dumbfounded and ect. and i kinda regretted changing my url. HAH! it was stupid, i guess. well, i did it anyway. (of course i can change it but i guess i just dont want to)

i dont know where to start. there are simply may things in m mind right now. like netbola's team. and how i should run more. and when will i really start my physic's revision. and i be able to grace chemm this O. and why the hell am i blogging right now (oh wait, i know already). and why there is so many 'and' in this para. how come things are just so difficult this year. why am beginning to think of all the negative things this year. how can i achieve things like last year and the last two years. how can i satisfy my rents. how can i do the what-seem-impossible and almost undoable. oh god.

well, i have a problem. i dont know how to speak up anymore. emotionally, it affects me. i dont know who i should turn to anymore. (i know there is Allah the Almighty forever there) there was this one day, i talked with my papa. he was always understanding and very supportive. but i still keep things to myself. i have a problem with sharing. i know, i know. its contradicting. how i tell people not to share. how i persuade them to tell me. to share with me their problems and not to keep mum. because dears, i know how hurtful it is, okay? that is why i urge you to share. because i know how its going to be in the end. you can not share with me and its fine if you dont want to share with me (cause who knows if you are uncomfortable with me) and no, of course you dont have to dependant unto that person but you have to find someone you trust really good and share. let me tell you of a friend i know that who really listens well and give hurtful, constructive comments. maryam. seriously. she my be sarcatsic and alla and may hurt you emotionally but after a while, when you think about what she said or told you, you'll see the sense in it. and mary, i love you okay, beetch? thank you.

i am going to pick up the guitar and strum some songs. yes, amidst all these important things to do, i want to pick up guitar and learn how to play it. and you know why? i fell in love with its melody. a drum is fun but its hard to practice (unless you own a kit or have a lot of moolahs and can go jam every other week). and te piano is real nice too but sadly i dont own one that is why i say that hafiz is a lucky guy.

extremist are real weird, eh?

and mama, i dont hate you. i am going to be someone ike you, remember? i cant hate you. i have a soft spot for you (but just sometimes, i cross that line) im sorry. i love you, okay?

GAH!

wassalam.